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>A bad marriage is like a horse with a broken leg, you can shoot the horse, but it don't fix the leg. 1 Marriage Counsellor 
>It matters not whether the cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice. a new Chinese Proverb 
>Statistics are like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive, but what they conceal is vital. Aaron Levenstein 
>The difference between an Irish Wake and an Irish Wedding is that there is one less drunk. an Irishman 
>A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead. Bird Brain 
>Christians have only one spouse. This is called monotony. Dee Vorced 
>The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country. George W. Bush 
>If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure. George W. Bush 
>The future will be better tomorrow. George W. Bush 
>A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls. George W. Bush 
>It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it. George W. Bush 
>A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere. Groucho Marx 
>There's no I in TEAM, but there is ME, if you jumble the letters. House 
>Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract and then goes into it, deserves all the consequences. Isadora Duncan 
>The seventh Commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery. Kids 
>The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple. Kids 
>A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain. Mark Twain 
>It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious. Murphy 
>When in doubt, mumble. Murphy 
>If it jams - force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway. Murphy 
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